Student Life

Egyptian Techno Party-Highway to the Danger Zone-Right and Honourable-Workshops-A Visit from the Goonsquad

Most of the site visits I’ve been on with the National Council have all been extremely professional, demure affairs. There has been, however, one notable exception: the Egyptian Defense Office. We knew that this visit was going to be a little different than our visit to the Saudi Embassy from the minute we walked in and Egyptian techno music was blasting at a level which made ordinary conversation difficult.  Instead of being humorlessly rushed through security as we were most everywhere else, they just let us walk through without checking us, yelling “Come in, come in! Our guests! Hello! Come in!” On the back wall, they projected a slide show that mostly consisted of various members of the Egyptian military high-fiving each other, giving a thumbs up to the camera, and I kid you not, in at least one memorable slide, wrestling an alligator. I think every intern was accosted at least once to make sure we had a drink in our hand.[i] “No! We do not start our presentation until everyone has a drink!” Their presentation, once it started, mostly consisted of a series of videos that showed off the prowess and might of the Egyptian military. I managed to find one of them on youtube and posted it below so you can see just how wonderfully, gloriously over the top it is. You half expect “The Danger Zone” to start playing. It’s also a bit too long.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgPclCHd5UI

After showing us a few more videos of the unstoppable and mighty Egyptian military and answering our questions, about Gaza, Israel, the Revolution etc… they were nice enough to feed us, making sure that we all had more than we could possibly ever eat on our plates and start up the techno again. Whether the loud techno music, propaganda and outright friendliness is standard operating procedure for the Egyptian military or whether this is a post revolution development, I cannot say. I can, however, say that once you’ve had a techno party with the Egyptian military, almost everything else just seems kind of boring in comparison. Perhaps the only other thing I’ve done here that can even come close to being as good a story was my lunch with the right and honourable Tony Blair.[ii]

The National Council brought Tony Blair and the U.S Ambassador to Saudi Arabia for a question and answer session regarding Palestine’s upcoming bid for statehood at the U.N. Mr. Blair, in the brief time that he was allotted, did a great job of answering questions in a vague, optimistic way that put everyone at relative ease. The British accent helped. That said, I have never felt more like an intern than I did at that luncheon. We interns were invited at the last minute, after the guest list had filled up. Those on the guest list tended to be, shall we say, “players”. Big names. So, until the powers that be were absolutely certain that the guests had all arrived and all had a seat, the interns had to stay out of sight and out of mind in the coat alcove. All 35 of us. Eventually though we were allowed to take whatever seats were available and enjoy what was pointed out to us as Five Star Catering and Five Star Service.[iii] More than one of us remarked that we felt a bit out of our element. No one embarrassed themselves all that bad, but a handful of us did have difficulty figuring out which of the three forks we were supposed to use at what time.

Mr. Blair and the U.S. Ambassador to Saudi Arabia answered questions for about 45 minutes before they were escorted out, leaving the interns to nervously mingle with the big names of American/MIddle East policy. I’ve eaten a lot of lunches of my life, but that one was without a doubt, in the top ten strangest.

Fun Fact: Tony Blair, who was in his youth a self described “Deadhead” was once in a Grateful Dead inspired/ Grateful Dead tribute band called Ugly Rumours. Right on, brother.

As for my internship with the CCAS, this past week we held a workshop for teachers from around the world on different approaches to teaching about the Middle East. Far and away, that was the best part of interning with the CCAS so far. We had two sessions a day, on topics ranging from contemporary Middle Eastern Music, to the sectarian politics of Iraq. There were sessions on the literature of the Middle Eastern diaspora and sessions on how Jewish, Christian and Muslim art all draw off of each other.[iv] As if that doesn’t sound good enough, this workshop was catered and I got to take home leftovers at the end of the day, which might not be a big deal to those of you who are gainfully employed, but for an intern like myself, getting to walk home with plates full of hummus and kibbeh every night and is a big deal. No Trader Joe’s Frozen Dinners for a week! However, I think the biggest lesson that this week-long seminar imparted to me was that a good deal of teachers at these workshops will, more often than not, behave in ways that they would never accept from their students. Arguing with the  lecturer, not raising their hand, talking with their neighbors during the lesson, not doing the reading…teachers, man. For those of you in academia: is that normal behavior during teacher workshops? Or was that just a select few in a small group of D.C. metro area educators?

As for the fourth of July? That will just have to wait until next week, because I am running out of room here and I think that story will fit better with the other stories I will have about the Dalai Lama, one of the largest mosques in the Western Hemisphere and a feminist punk festival [v].I write a sentence like that last one and remember just how grateful I am to have had this opportunity. If there’s any UPS students reading this who are interested in the Middle East, I would strongly encourage you to apply for next summer. I can’t promise you’ll have a weekend involving the Dalai Lama and a feminist punk festival, but there never seems to be a shortage of extraordinarily interesting things going on in D.C.

Addendum: Due to unforeseen circumstances involving a drunken room-mate and a gift card, I’m writing this blog from inside of a Starbucks. Blogging…at Starbucks…yeesh. This raises the same question I had last week when I enjoyed a concert from the back of the room with the rest of the aging hipsters instead of up in front with the thrashing and wild-haired  youth: When did I get so square? Ahhh well.

[ii] I should clarify this. In the words of my little brother “Shut up dude. Don’t give me that…you were a volunteer intern at a luncheon that Tony was at. Don’t make it sound you and Tony are going out for sandwiches.” So there you go. I was a volunteer intern at a luncheon.

[iii] I’m no vegetarian, nor have I ever belonged to PETA, but it seems wrong to me to put a fried egg on top of a piece of chicken. You’re also apparently supposed to use one of those knifes for the salad, even though the lettuce is already shredded…looks like I have a lot to learn about fine dining.

[iv] This last lecture also had a section on architecture, which validated some of my uninformed hypotheses that I set forth a few weeks back.

[v] Needless to say, these three are not connected. Can you imagine how cool it would be if they were though? That would be the best story ever.

-National Treasures-Second Story-Farmers Market-Smithsonian- Fishin’ Blues- NCTC-Back to the Future-

Last week I discussed some world famous monuments that some, I suppose, would call “national treasures”. Here is a short list of some lesser known national treasures that I have run across in D.C.

1.)    Second Story Books. This is right across the street from the stop for the bus that I take five days a week. Here, I found and bought a first edition of Joyce’s Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man for 5 dollars. Awesome.  It seems to be less of a used book store and more of an antique store that specializes in books. If you’re looking for a copy of the DaVinci Code, you might want to check elsewhere, but if you want an illustrated copy of the Tibetan Book of the Dead from the 20’s, children’s books from the time immemorial, or whatever this is: 

you’re in luck. If you want to go to a bookstore where Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan plays over the speakers, posters and art from 80 years ago adorns the walls, where an old woman in a wheelchair browses through lesbian fiction and someone with a striking resemblance to Afrika Bambaataa browses the poetry wall and tells his friend “now that Bush is out of the White House, it’s time for me to meditate on writing an autobiography”, Second Story Books can provide all of that and more. This is the kind of bookstore where books are literally stacked to the ceiling and falling off of the shelves, but so fastidiously organized that they have individual sections for various waves of feminism. Places like these are increasingly few and far between so if you’re ever in D.C., stop by and help keep these weirdos afloat. Weird independent bookstores are national treasures.

2.)    The DuPont Circle farmers market. I didn’t even know this existed; I just stumbled across it on my way out of Second Story. Farmer’s markets are a national treasure, and if my uninformed prophecy is correct, are going to become increasingly important in coming decades. Support farmers markets. They smell like basil, diesel fumes and broken strawberries. You can buy homemade soap, all of which seems to smell faintly of cinnamon. You can buy goat cheese, and goat cheese is delicious. Farmers markets are national treasures.

3.)    If you’ll allow me to name a D.C. national treasure that I haven’t actually seen but just came to my mind: Henry Rollins, a D.C. native, is also a national treasure. [i]

4.) The F.D.R Monument, which is stunning is a national treasure. Well done Washington D.C. Well done.

5.)    Alright, so the Smithsonian Museums aren’t exactly “lesser known”, but the fact remains that I am absolutely smitten with them. First and foremost, they have an astonishing amount of stuff. And to think how much more they have in their warehouses and archives! The mind reels. But what is truly admirable about the Smithsonian institution is that they let you see all of this stuff for free, which is absolutely and completely noble. Straight up noble. That is America at its absolute, if theoretical, best. I’ve enjoyed every single one that I’ve seen so far immensely. Notably, the  American History museum, which is seemingly eternally crowded with people lined up to see Abraham Lincoln’s top hat and Dorothy’s ruby red shoes. This museum also has a large exhibit on the history of American War, which is presented admirably, but hard to walk through on a crowded day when boys and men run excitedly up to weapons and admire them with gleaming eyes and compare them to their own and to others they have seen. The knowledge that 10 year olds have about weapons is astonishing, and, not to sound like a self-righteous bleeding heart liberal arts student, a bit troubling. I, for one, enjoyed the display of American propaganda much more. Perhaps it was a bit too effective? Part of the Vietnam exhibit features a wall of televisions showing notable televised Vietnam moments, Vietnam, of course, being the first “T.V. War”. A whole crowd of people sat down to watch, and then, bizarrely, started taking pictures of the televisions. I’m still trying to figure that one out.  The Air and Space museum is interesting enough, I suppose, but awfully crowded. A majority of the crowd in the Air and Space museum is made up of school groups and D.O.V’s[ii], both of which, like interns, seem to flood D.C. in the summer time.  My favorite Smithsonian museums to date are the Native American museum, the African Art museum the Hirshorn Gallery[iii] and the Freer Gallery[iv]. I still have much more to see which is both daunting and exciting. The Smithsonian institution is a national treasure of there ever was one. The Smithsonian institution is also responsible for Smithsonian Folkways, which has been and continues to be one of my favorite record labels. Their mission is simply to collect and distribute rare folk music from around the world. For as much as I’ve fallen head over heels in love with a million different pieces of art at Smithsonian museums in the past few weeks, my favorites are still the ones from Folkways. What makes them just barely better than the other Smithsonian exhibitions is that they’re every bit as valuable as the ancient Maya art or American battle ships, but you can take them with you anywhere. Out of the many, many, many songs that Folkways has brought into my life, this is one of the best: Henry Thomas’ Fishin Blues, played on Guitar and Porcupine Quill Pipe. This song is from perhaps the greatest folkways record of all, the Anthology of American Folk Music, which is one of my all time, desert island favorites. 6 discs of weird, wild, and wonderful folk from the 20’s 30’s and 40’s, every bit as mysterious and beautiful as the human genome project or the religious text of your choice assembled by the experimental film-maker, magician, alchemist, and mystic Harry Smith. Fiddle breakdowns, french-cajun rave ups, a capella gospel, blues, protest songs, bluegrass, and music that can only be described as “other”, the Smithsonian institution did the world a massive favor by releasing not only the Anthology of American Folk Music but all of their other records. And because I still believe in the imaginary, old, weird America, this record has become the soundtrack to much of my D.C. experience. But I digress.

Onto internship business: the highlight this week was our visit to the National Counter Terrorism Center, i.e, where the CIA, FBI, Department of Homeland Security, military, and “others” get their information on global terrorism. A truly fascinating place. Security there, unsurprisingly, was extremely tight, but we got to see some really fascinating stuff, including the main information gathering room, which looked not unlike the set for the television program 24. This NCTC visit was one of two that has sparked some career-type thoughts in me, as these visits were surely meant to do. Now, honestly, my unrealistic ideal for a career would be some split between homesteader/small farmer and teacher. If I want to actually make money however, it’s not impossible to think that I could do this NCTC stuff. Not, of course, that I’m cut out to be a spy or anything. On the contrary, as those of you who know me probably know, I would make an absolutely terrible spy. But one arm of the NCTC that we talked to was focused on preventing terrorism through education, community outreach etc… subjects that are near and dear to my heart indeed. Instead of taking out terrorists, these folks take out the factors that cause radicalism. Even though this job would most likely involve wearing a suit most days, I think I would enjoy it. Incidentally, the other job idea was spurred when I saw a presentation by the head of ANERA[v] . One thing is for sure, every day I’m here, especially on days when we have these lectures[vi] and visits, I’m getting a lot of raw material to work with and grind over in consideration of what my future is going to look like. Because right now, I’ve never felt so certain or so unbelievably lost as to what that’s going to be. You think you’ve got it figured out and then it comes back at you. Who knows?

In conclusion, this is awesome:

About time!

[ii] D.O.V is my own acronym for “Dads on Vacation”. Most of you probably know exactly what I’m talking about. They stand there in front of the exhibits with their hands clasped behind their back, reading extremely carefully, and take pictures of everything. They have, or would like to think they have just as much knowledge as the tour guides or park rangers, and ask extremely specific questions to prove it. The D.O.V usually has his family in tow, and may also have on his person one or more of the following: aviator sunglasses, a fanny pack, shorts and really pale legs, a souvenir t-shirt, a camera hanging around his neck and a look on his sunburned face that combines happiness to be here and be with his family with frustration at said family for lagging behind, not smiling in the picture, or complaining. The D.O.V may also have a fondness for taking “hilarious” pictures of himself or his family.^a The D.O.V’s are everywhere in D.C, but seemed to be especially populous at the Air and Space museum, obviously. Also see: http://dadsonvacation.tumblr.com/

^{a.)Happy father’s day dad! You’re awesome.}

[iii] Modern Art

[iv] Mostly Asian art, which I was surprised to find myself falling so hard for, as I’ve never been all that into Asian art. Don’t know what switched, but I was enthralled.

[v] Amercan Near East Refugee Aid, a non-profit that is exactly what you think it is. I think I would have some unrealistic and self righteous moral qualms about working at the NCTC, even though the people we talked to seemed to be of a similar mindset as me, i.e, one person we spoke with was  a religious gentleman who said that the particular religious deity he worships essentially led him to work there so he could help stop the spread of hatred in the world and promote interfaith understanding. Whoa. RIGHT up my proverbial alley. Still though…and I realize that one afternoon there is not enough to make these kind of judgments, I think I would be more comfortable working for a non-profit than a large,secretive government organization. This illuminates a struggle that I hope isn’t unique to me: my socialist leanings vs. my distrust of the government. Principled collectivism vs. rugged individualism, if you will.

[vi] This past week saw a lecture by the U.S. Ambassador to Qatar. Interesting fellow.

Here is a bonus, and thematically appropriate, song from the good people at the Smithsonian institution.

Birdwatching-Washington-Lincoln-Folk Art-Movie Sets-The Invisible Hand of the Market-The Supremes

Lately, I’ve become somewhat interested in two things that I have absolutely no background in or knowledge about: bird watching and architecture. Allow me to make a few completely uninformed statements on the latter.

It’s glaringly obvious that there were no women consulted when the Washington Monument was being designed.

I understand the historical (and Masonic) significance of an obelisk but I think that it shows a total lack of imagination. I know that at this time that this sort of architecture was in vogue and would have made sense for a scrappy young country with something to prove, but even at that…it’s not very imaginative is it? Furthermore, at night, the two red lights on either side give it a rather sinister look that, at best looks like it’s watching you and at worst, I hate to say, looks like an evil cartoon.  Tell me I’m wrong:

I’m told that the Washington Monument is the tallest building in Washington, D.C. (ii) Honestly now…that’s just obnoxious. This, I suppose, is so that if you are in Washington D.C. and suffer a crisis of faith in America, it will always there to inspire you.

Here are two other things that the Washington Monument reminds me of.

-Something sent down from another planet to watch us, a la Kubrick’s 2001, a Space Odyssey.

-The world’s most ostentatious game of Jenga.

-An ambitious flagpole

-That big tower with the flaming eye on top in Lord of the Rings.

I have nothing against George Washington, but overall, I have to give this monument a C-.

The Lincoln Memorial, on the other hand, is really quite impressive. From the Washington Monument, you can see the bright lights kneeling and offering themselves up to Lincoln, who sits on his throne like some sort of benevolent American God. I’m not sure whether this effect is increased or decreased by the frantic and constant non-stop of camera flashes also visible from the WM.

This monument, like so many others in Washington, D.C. makes no secret of its heritage to the classical ideal. This thing is all gleaming white pillars, lofty ceilings and a long, grand staircase leading up to it that re-enforces the feeling you’re walking into a temple. Even though I am no fan of this sort of Beaux-Arts architecture, (iii) it certainly achieved its purpose here, that is, to fill you with a sense of reverence and awe. And that, for me, is the problem. It is hard to imagine a man who less fit the mold of Roman God than Abraham Lincoln.  I’m a big Abraham Lincoln fan, but for me, what I’ve always found so fascinating about Lincoln was just how…different he was. No doubt he was a great man, but he was also tall and lanky, often described as “ugly” in his own time. He was an independent thinker, often accused of deism or outright atheism. He struggled with depression, and coped with this by constantly joking about everything. If there is one thing that I took from Professor Breitenbach’s class on Abraham Lincoln it is that Lincoln was a freak of nature. By that measure, I think that Lincoln memorial achieves what it wants to achieve (reverence and awe), but for me personally, that is a bit far removed from what I (at best an amateur Lincoln scholar) would consider the true Abraham Lincoln. If I was in charge, a Lincoln memorial would be for the people, by the people. What I mean by that is that it would be some sort of weird folk-art tribute that, without diminishing his greatness, also reminded people of just how unbelievable it was that this self-educated, indecisive yokel with a fondness for puns saved the United States and how proud we should be of that. Something that, like Lincoln, seemed truly indigenous to America. Something that was not trying to fulfill some ancient Roman prophecy, but was just as uniquely American and strange as Roscoe Holcomb, Grandma Moses or Clementine Hunter. Maybe a log cabin instead of a Parthenon rip-off. I just don’t see why we should make Lincoln conventionally or classically great and instead celebrate his greatness as it was… “warts and all”. (iv)

Yeah, that's more like it!

Don’t cover up your own bizarre, misshapen heroes America! Quit trying to impress the Europeans! Quit trying to impress that European part of you!

I can’t fully judge the Lincoln Memorial because the reflecting pool was an empty pile of “under construction” dirt when I visited. Which, actually, is fine with me, because I didn’t need to see the Washington Monument, like Narcissus, admire its reflection in the water all day.

Overall Grade for the Lincoln Memorial: B+

What’s really funny about all of this, the Lincoln and Washington Monuments, the Capitol, the Vietnam Memorial, and the White House(v) is that they’re all right next to each other.  It’s weird… you almost get the sense that you’re on a movie set that’s just waiting for Roland Emmerich or Michael Bay to come wreak havoc. That illusion is broken only when you realize that this movie set is smack dab in the middle of a busy and normal American metropolis. For example, my dorm is a block and a half from, among other things, the Mexican embassy, which it itself next door to a dry cleaner. I am also no more than a block and a half from the I.M.F and both a T.G.I.Friday’s (vi) and a Johnny Rockets. I think if a lot of people had their way, the grand monuments, war memorials grand buildings inside which the world is being run in a separate part of town from the Starbucks, CVS Pharmacies, and kitschy chain restaurants. However, the free market won out, and what could possibly be more American than that? Despite its attempts at Roman Grandeur, Washington D.C is still a normal American city. I see homeless people sleeping around the National Mall at night (vii).  Kids get high and make out on the train. People yell at each other in various languages outside of the Target.  Washington D.C is just a city. People are just people, and that’s why the Mexican Embassy shares a wall with a dry cleaners.

Oh man, there is SO MUCH cool stuff here that I haven’t even touched on yet. Smithsonian museums, fascinating people, embassy visits, interesting intern work…I guess we’ll have to talk about all that in later weeks. Just one quick story before I let you go. This is a good one.

My fellow National Council interns and I took a visit to the Supreme Court. I’ll spare you my feelings on the Beaux-Arts grand columns, big robed statues, and symbolic friezes both on the façade and in the courtroom of this building, all of which, I might add, were made of marble imported from around the world(viii). Instead, I’ll just say this: insider tours are awesome. Without them, we wouldn’t have gotten to see Justice Sotomayor practicing her softball throw in the gym. This was surprising for a few reasons. I did not know that there was a gym on the top floor of the Supreme Court, nor did I know that Kagan was not the only justice who played softball. I’ll also admit to getting a little bit star-struck… I’m a big Sotomayor fan. Out of all of the current Supremes, she might be my favorite.

Love,

-Isaac

(ii) This was told to me by one of the park rangers on duty, a friendly old woman who really, genuinely seemed to love the Washington Monument. Despite our differing opinions on the aesthetics of said monument, which I did not go into with her, I have to say that she, like most park rangers, was a wonderful person. This same park ranger also told me that, at the time of completion, the Washington Monument was the tallest building in the world. Now, of course, the tallest building in the world is Burj Khalifa, in Dubai.

(iii) I think, in general, it reveals something of an inferiority complex that goes all the way back to the Renaissance. When the Middle East and Chinese were looking at the universe, writing poetry, and inventing things, Europe was mostly sitting around misinterpreting the Bible, sitting the mud, and getting the plague. Once the Renaissance came about, the Europeans felt a need to prove themselves, but not wanting to compare themselves to the Arabs or Asians, tried to claim the mantle of the Romans. The (non-native) Americans, who of course, came from Europe, chose to run with this type of architecture because they were also insecure, having just started a new country an all, they needed to not only impress the Europeans, but prove to Europe and themselves that they were just as great as the Europeans imagined the Romans to be. They justified this insecurity with exaggerated connections to “democracy”. I have nothing to back this theory up.

(iv) To quote G.H.W Bush, misquoting Lincoln. Still, I think it applies.

(v) Which I’ll admit to liking, actually. I’m not a communist.

(vi) This T.G.I.Friday’s is literally right outside of my dorm. I’ll discuss the existential terror that this fills me with and my growing appreciation for UPS later.

(vii) I saw a homeless guy with a wooden replica of Captain America’s shield in his cart. This, to me, sums up Washington D.C.

(viii)I’ll save them for this footnote, and instead of sharing my own feelings, I’ll share the feelings of Chief Justice Harlan Stone, who said it was “almost, bombastically pretentious”; the feelings of another Justice who said it reminded him of the Temple of Karnak; another justice who felt that the pomp of the thing made him think it would be more appropriate for the Justices to ride in on elephants; and a New Yorker columnist who hilariously added that “it had nice big windows to throw the New Deal out of”.