Residence Life at Puget Sound

Written by Kimberly Webber, Resident Programming Assistant (RPA) in Todd/Phibbs

DISCLAIMER: I had a fantastic freshman year and to this day, my best friends are those who lived on my residence hall floor, or on the floor above mine. That being said, here goes my story of an atypical first week at Puget Sound.

My randomly assigned roommate decided to take a family vacation to Australia at the end of summer, only to return 2 days before the first day of classes. I knew that while everyone else was clinging to their roommate for meals and orientation activities while they got acquainted with the campus and introduced to more freshmen, I would have to take an extra initiative to meet some people whit whom I could survive Orientation. But I definitely did not let this get me down on move-in day.

I had been talking to a Junior-class RA prior to coming to campus after she emailed me to see if I had any questions. I told her where I would be living and she spoke so highly of my RA’s, told me I had a great view overlooking North Quad and that my room was on the end of the hall closest to the girls bathroom, by the stairs—closest to the SUB—and that nearly all the rooms in A/L were huge—so overall, I was ecstatic. I could not wait for my freshman year and Orientation, even if that meant going through it without a roommate.

August 17th, I showed up, signed some forms, got my key, and was shown to my room by my RA. Top of the stairs to the left. One of two rooms on the left…and judging by the lack of name tags on the door across from mine… this moment began my week-long physical isolation from the rest of the HUGE floor of A/L 3. I was the only resident to the left of the main stairway, to the right of which lived all of my hall mates.

I tried not to let this news fade my excitement… but it was tough. I got all my stuff up to my room, and as my brother did a Target run and my mom helped me unpack, the door propped open by a microwave, feeling sorry for myself was all I could do and—despite her restraint to communicate it as many times as I did—all my mom could do too.

I had so been looking forward to being a freshman, to being a Logger, and to making so many new friends. I walked down the hall a few times that day pretending I needed to use the restroom or fill up my water bottle, just hoping someone would have their door propped open like mine was, waiting for a friendly face to pop in. Only 3 of the 30-ish doors were open… boys and parents and people making themselves busy… I lost my courage and apparently my lifelong sociable attitude went with it. And again, I found myself feeling sorry for my situation… and blamed it on just that—my situation.

It took my older-by-3-years brother to make me realize that all I had to do was to CHANGE my situation. Of course, I didn’t come to this realization lightly or until it paid off. I went to meet the cross-country coach and on the way back from the Fieldhouse to A/L, my brother asked if he could take a look at my room key and I obliged. Then he went to Wal-Mart… with my key, telling me to “go make friends”! Meanwhile my mom was headed to an information session about Library Resources.

I headed to North Quad, up the stairs to the third floor and instead of turning left this time… I turned right. I was hoping desperately that since it was later in the day, students would have begun to settle in, maybe have a door stop in place to catch some visitors. Maybe up to 6 doors were opened now. But still the sheer amount of people in each room, between 2 roommates, their parents and siblings, was overwhelming for just me. 2 laps of the floor and back to the far end of the building before I came to a HUGE triple room, with one occupant who just so happened to have the same bed spread as me from the linens catalogue we were mailed during the summer. Easy enough topic to strike up a conversation about, right? Well it was! I then proceeded to tell my new (FIRST!) friend of college, Calli, how my brother took my key so I could put myself out there and make friends. Calli’s parents had already gone home and she loved what I was doing and wanted to come along to meet people. Just down the hall we met Kailee (with her parents, but that didn’t stop us… I guess there’s strength in numbers.) And after being struck again by my initial timidity in approaching the other people on my hall, the 3 of us decided it would be best to start downstairs on the 2nd floor. So we went from room to room, meeting students and parents as “Calli, Kailee, and Kimberly”—confusing a few people for the next couple of weeks, let me tell you!—and from then on, I was the social one. I was the girl who was friendly to all and who put herself out there. This is a role I had always taken on before and was ready to embrace as a new freshman, but was so caught up on my negative situation that I was willing to risk not exuding a great first impression around people I would spend the next 4 years with!

So take it from me; even if your expectations for your year start low…very low, and things seem to be off to a bumpy start, IT GETS BETTER! You don’t need a blunt older brother, a large hall, a outward enthusiasm or a matching bed spread. You just need to take the situation for what it is: an opportunity, not a sentence. And if you’re worried about it, talk to your RA–we’re here to help!

My half of the room on move-in day, fit with the purple bed spread that began my first friendship with the girl down the hall

My roommate’s side that was sadly empty for the first week

My RA’s on A/L3, Krista and Taylor, who truly helped me out so much!

Written By Kimberly Webber, Resident Programming Assistant (RPA) in Todd/Phibbs

I know you don’t want to hear this, but there really is no one way to prepare to live with a new person for 8 months. He/she may be a perfect stranger, a teammate, a friend, a Facebook acquaintance, a family member… I’ve seen it all during my freshman year and no matter the type of pair, I’ve seen successes and failures across the board. I’ve figured out that the key to roommates is open-mindedness. This applies if you just want to cohabitate peacefully, get along with, or even befriend your roommate (and again, I’ve seen it all happen). I couldn’t find my roommate on Facebook when I found out her name and freaked out for a solid four days until she called me and we talked for an hour and got along so well! It turned out that her page was just private and I shouldn’t have assumed she was some social hermit (because being on Facebook is really getting out in the world…).

Another key is being upfront and honest, without being rude of course. My roommate, the absolutely sweetest girl, moved out at the end of November because I sleep talk. Because this was something that happened sporadically and I couldn’t control, she felt bad confronting me about it. I didn’t find out that she had been having trouble sleeping until TWO DAYS before she moved out! And when she finally did tell me, she was crying and then I started crying—not the ideal situation. She had gone through the whole process of talking to our RA, then RD, then Residence Life to find a new room before I even knew it was a problem. Help out your roommate people: whether he/she/they can control the situation or not, talk it out!

There’s no exact science behind how much you should or shouldn’t talk to your roommate before coming to school, but I would advise talking enough to decide who will bring a microwave, mini-fridge, maybe a rug, or anything else communal you might want—though none of these items are necessary.

Universities don’t just pair new students up to save space and money, though it may seem that way at times. Use this opportunity to practice those skills you learned back in Kindergarten: clean up after yourself, be respectful, communicate effectively, be friendly and open to all. If 5-year-olds can do it, you college kids can figure out living with new roommates—and if you have any problems or questions once you get here, never hesitate to talk to your RA, we’re here for you!

Written by Kimberly Webber, Resident Programming Advisor (RPA) for Todd/Phibbs

UPS campus shot, my home away from home

College is what you make it and at a school like UPS in a town like Tacoma, it’s easy to make it your home. Everything I’ve mentioned in my previous blog posts about Residence Life is the very definition of home. Puget Sound is dedicated to forging the optimal on-campus living environment—one of the many reasons we instated the 2-year live on requirement for new freshmen. My advice to make this place feel like home is to get involved in whatever you can. This may be a sport or an organized club through UPS. Maybe you find a Facebook page for an unofficial club/group activity. Maybe you join yoga for an activity credit and find a group who goes off campus for yoga or does it on Event Lawn (next to Todd Field and the New Res. Hall) once a week. Maybe you become really close with your floor mates in your residence hall, or even another floor in or out of your residence hall. You can get involved with ASUPS (our student government) by becoming a freshman senator or attending open Senate meetings. You can (and should!) join your hall’s RHA or just attend RHA/RSA meetings on your own. Find a group of students and go running together; play Frisbee together; study together. Work at Diversions, Oppenheimer or in the Cellar to see new friendly faces all the time. Do SOMETHING. Get OUT. Or stay in… but do what you do with others!

A/L3 floor bonding at Tower Lanes mini golf

A/L3 floor dinner in the SUB

Coming from a family of 6, I believe that feeling at home has a lot to do with family; feeling comfortable with your surroundings has a lot to do with the people you surround yourself with. I was fortunate to find myself feeling at home during my freshman year at UPS and I owe that to the people I call family… my Passages group, my hall mates from A/L 3, the other members of my RHA and from all the RHA’s across campus, the girls I found to run with every week after Cross Country was over and I didn’t join the Track team, other students following my Major or Minor who kept popping up in my classes, and friends of all of those friends.

North Quad t-shirts designed by A/L resident, Kyle (second from right)

Puget Sound gave me the opportunity to get involved and if I were to give ONE PIECE of advice to incoming freshmen, I would tell them all to take advantage of all the Puge has to offer. You can always let up later if you feel you’re too busy, but there is nothing like those initial quality friends you meet through exploring similar interests, so GET INVOLVED! And if you’re not on campus yet, but reading this—check out the Student Activities website or the Resident Student Association website to find out how you can get more involved in on and off campus activities.